Me VS Food

Be warned, I have a lot to ramble about today haha! So today I went to hospital because they wanted to see how I'm doing on these IVs. I told them about the weird side effects and they said if they're too much I can change antibiotics, but I decided to stay on them because there's very few I can actually have nowadays because I'm resistant or allergic to them. Can't be bothered with the hassle of changing! They do take ages though, as usually I have to push the drugs through a syringe like this but this time one of them is in like a bubble thing. I have to wait about 45mins for it to go through, meaning that IVs are taking me about an hour to do this time rather than the usual 15mins or so. Doing this three times a day is knackering!



But this isn't my problem, right now it's my weight that is giving me aggro. I was shown a chart of my lung function and weight over the years. The higher my weight has been, the better my breathing is, so I have to have a very high calorie diet and have a feeding tube, which I wrote about here. I have the poorest appetite ever and am naturally slim anyway, so keeping weight up is such a challenge. What doesn't help is that I find eating to be a chore. Since I can remember I've been constantly interrogated about food and how much I've eaten that day. My family are constantly saying 'Are you hungry? What have you eaten today? YOU MUST EAT!!!!!' It's the most annoying thing ever, it's like I'm 19 now please just leave me alone. I know they nag because they care, but I just wanna do my nut whenever someone talks to me about food. I'm gritting my teeth now just typing about it haha! The more someone nags you, the less you wanna do it I suppose. 
I so badly wanna put weight on though! I don't look good superskinny and my clothes are hanging off me which is annoying. Plus I want my breathing to be better! So I'm off to eat cake haha.

8 comments

  1. Hope you can put on weight - you go eat that cake! I've not got CF but I've got a ridiculously high metabolism which means I've always been on the receiving ends of bitchy comments about my weight, from guys too! I understand how horrible it is wanting to be able to put on weight, much luck xx

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  2. Oh dear i hope you feel better soon. As for the food thing - how about trying to eat a lot more of the food that you actually really like? I don`t know, might help) You`re beautiful - stay strong!

    >'.'<

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  3. I'm sorry, dear...I had the same problem in my family. My mom constantly nagged me to gain weight, gain weight and quizzed me on my eating...and it just made me hate food! But since I've gotten away, I've learned to really love finding new foods to eat and using cooking as a creative outlet...I just hope you can find a fun way to make healthy living enjoyable for you too.

    <3 Cambria
    jupefashion.blogspot.com

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  4. There's nothing worse than be asked about something or told to do something at times! I have a strange appetite, I'm quite fussy and some days I'm not hungry at all and other days I could eat a horse! If its something thats going to help you health wise you should try different approaches with eating. Like try and meet up with friends over lunch more often or pick out new recipes and try them out yourself. At least that way it becomes a bit more fun, I really enjoy cooking at times and I'm becoming less fussy so I guess thats a good thing!

    joanne from jimmilou.com

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  5. Oh my goodness hun, it tears at my heart string to read your post and see your update but Im glad things are going on the up? Anyway its a bummer that the antibiotics are making you react that way but you'd be the best judge as to the right course of action. REALLY detest when people constatnly interrogate me about food too. Its just an uneccesary worry sometimes. Anyway I really do sincerely jope you feel better. Will be eagerly looking for your updates on ya hun.

    Eeli xo

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  6. Good luck darling!! Love the end "I am off to eat cake" haha!

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  7. It must be a real pain being asked that all the time! But yeah I guess just try eat whatever you want, whenever you want! Anyway I hope you feel better soon and I look forward to your next update! xx

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  8. Sorry to hear about you have to do more IV's. Hope you are feeling better soon and that you can find some super yummy foods to enjoy!

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